Virtual Town Hall with no Senator Present

On Saturday, February 22, a couple of concerned Kansas citizens hosted a virtual Town Hall with Senator Jerry Moran invited. Over 500 people from every Kansas district attended on Zoom or watched the live YouTube video, but Senator Moran wasn’t one of them. Instead, his spot was an empty chair with his photo and nametag on it. That didn’t stop people from sharing deep concerns about the direction our country has taken since the January inauguration. The 30-some selected speakers shared words spoken with “deep and genuine emotion.”  One person called the collected statements a “perfect pot luck—each statement brings a unique flavor . . . a perfect cross section of concerns.” For over two hours a constant stream of comments from the listeners showed how well the messages resonated with those in attendance. Here’s a sampling:

“The viability of the [US] Constitution is at risk.” “We’re all at a crossroads of peril like never before.” “I cannot believe that MAGA has stooped SO low that people need to be educated about the most fundamental LAWS of this democracy.” “It’s so disheartening to see how low we’ve gone as a country.” “I’m concerned about my private information. What are you going to do to stop this theft, Senator?”

“We are imploring you to act. Musk needs to go, Trump needs to be reined in. He is not a king.” “Retired barely 3 years, I fear for my future. I worry about my young grandchildren and the world they face.” “We are falling into fascism, the time is now, Senator Moran, save this country, we elected you to speak for us.”

“This is ridiculous for us to need to speak up to ask our representatives to follow the constitution!” “Thank you for pointing out the lack of transparency and the insanity of having to plead that our congressional representatives do their job and represent all Kansans.” “Senator Moran—and while we’re at it Senator Marshall—DO YOUR JOB!”

“And we are a country that is supposed be based on law.” “Agree with the concern that the administration is acting illegally – above the law. Without the rule of law none of us are safe.” “Honor your oath, Senator.” “[You] swore to protect the Constitution from even ‘domestic’ opponents.” “Shame on you, Senator Moran!” “Yes, remember your oath, Sen Moran!” “WHY do we have to beg you to honor your oath?”

“Who do you serve, Sen Moran? Your constituents? Or the billionaires running the show now???” “Checks and Balances! Where are you, Sen Moran, and the rest of Congress?” “Where are you and when are you going to step up and stand up to the Trump regime?” “Mr. Moran, why did you not accept the invitation to attend this event?” “​​WHO DO YOU SERVE, Sen Moran???” “Mr. Moran, do you only want to hear from those that agree with you? You are a REPRESENTATIVE of all citizens, not only the ones that agree with you.”

“Senator Moran, are you listening?” “How is it possible that we are having to beg our senator to do the right thing?” “Where are you, Senator Moran? We want answers!!!” “Why do we have to beg to keep the programs that are necessary in order to fund tax cuts that benefit the obscenely rich?” “WHO DO YOU SERVE, Sen Moran???” “We should not have to beg for representation. It’s a terrible time.”

“We need and expect you, Senator, to represent the people of Kansas. We need you to stand up to the current administration.” “This is emotional because we can see it slipping away. Please, Senator Moran, help us save democracy and what we were founded on.” “I have lived under martial law (South Africa), dictatorship (Portugal) and a Marxist government (Mozambique). I’m a US citizen and I deeply value our democracy — help us keep it, Senator!” “It’s unconscionable that we are literally fighting to keep our great country and our democracy intact. In just 4 weeks, the foundations of our government have been so damaged.” “Senator Moran why must we beg you to do your job?”

From a voter on a first-name basis with the senator, “Please Jerry….Listen. Listen. Listen with your heart.”

Interested citizens can watch the recorded meeting at https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PFMCDDooC1U

Rise Up and Ride

Never, no never, did nature say one thing and wisdom say another.  (Edmund Burke)

Heading to Wichita years ago for a Sunday dinner with my husband’s parents, a stiff breeze buffeted our car.

“Look out for that bird!” I yelled. “Why do they do that?”

“Do what?” Craig asked from the driver’s seat.

“Fly at the car. You know, when we’re driving along, it seems like most of the birds sitting on the roadside wait until we’re almost there and then jump into our path. Haven’t you noticed? That last one was a close call.”

“You’ve heard of bird brains, haven’t you?”

“Very funny. Well then, why don’t half of them fly the other way? No wonder so many birds get hit by cars.”

“There’s another reason.”

“What’s that?”

“The wind. It depends what direction the wind is blowing. Watch. There are a couple of meadowlarks up on the crest of the next hill. They will jump into the wind—right at us—to get airborne.”

I studied the larks as we approached. Sure enough, just before we achieved the crest, they each leapt directly into the path of our car. They swerved sharply and fluttered to the north, over a dormant winter pasture.

“Why not just fly away from the car to begin with?”

“They get lift a lot faster if they jump into the wind,” he said.

“Really? You mean they couldn’t fly if they didn’t meet the wind head-on?”

“Pretty much. It probably depends on wind velocity. I think if the wind isn’t too strong, they could take off with a breeze, but it would take more effort to get airborne going with the wind. You see how they turn and go with the wind once they get in the air?”

We watched another pair of meadowlarks follow the same pattern.

“They know they can get up faster heading into the wind, and if the wind is too strong they won’t get lift unless they face into it,” he said.

~~

Since the inauguration of #47, I have felt like one of those larks. A barrage of insane and appalling executive orders sweeps from the White House with category 5 hurricane force, devastating every state in the union regardless of geographic location or political leaning. I don’t know how to begin to resist the devastation, or even to absorb all the news. You may feel the same way. But unless we get out there to face the onslaught and jump headlong into the gale force winds, we’re sunk. In whatever way each of us can manage, we need to launch against the wind of insanity and rise above it to soar toward a better future. Don’t run. Don’t hide. Don’t ignore the news. Instead, rise up and ride on the wings of the wind. It will make a difference for our future.

Wisdom of Geese

I’ve been trying to figure out what the first step in resistance to tyranny should look like in my life.(Timothy Snyder–“Do not obey in advance.”)

I think perhaps it’s simple: just keep on keepin’ on. I will attempt to do what I do, to be who I am called to be, to stand for my values and ethics through every avenue available to me, as long as I am able.

That step was confirmed by the geese I watched this morning. On my daily route across the pasture, a flock of Canadian geese swept into the sky from their morning pursuit of gleaning seeds from a field across the road. The immediate and overwhelming cacophony stopped me in my tracks. Something had spooked the winged crowd and they all took flight. The racket drowned out even highway noise. They circled for a few minutes, settled quietly down again, and returned to being the geese they were called to be. Kept on. Flew on. Settled down, and returned to their geesehood pursuits.

 

Yes. That’s it. “Do not obey in advance.” Doesn’t mean to ignore stimuli (bad news, calls to action), but do not let it take over my life either. Keep on keepin’ on.

 

As Edmund Burke said, “Never, no never, did Nature say one thing and Wisdom say another.”

 

Winter Petunias

A petunia seed sprouted in a large container on my deck late in the summer, and I brought it inside before frost. It is companion to a succulent that would not last the winter, sharing the same pot. Since then, this petunia put out quite a few blossoms, even though it’s wintertime.

It longs to be outside in warm summer sunshine.

But it wouldn’t last long in the snow! So it just looks out the window, daydreaming about what life would bring in a different time.

May we all be like Miss Petunia–longing for better times, but putting out our blooms anyway. We will need to be as resilient in the coming days, taking what comes our way, and doing our best with it.

Bloom anyway.

The Resistance Begins

“I believe that unarmed truth and unconditional love will have the final word in reality. This is why right, temporarily defeated, is stronger than evil triumphant.”                    MLK

In the approach to January 20 and the changing of the powers in our country’s capital, I’ve read that it’s important to be absent from those events on mainstream media.

Don’t even think about tuning in to watch on television. Keep your distance for a week. Or longer.

I will cling to sanity in the face of the chaos that is sure to come.

I plan to check in with trusted commentators through Substack and/or Bluesky such as Robert Hubbell (Today’s Edition Newsletter), Joyce Vance (Civil Discourse), and Heather Cox Richardson (Letters From an American). Jessica Craven (Chop Wood Carry Water) tries to share good news on her substack, as well as simple things we can do to make a difference. We can all use some of that.

Robert Hubbell dispensed this advice about the coming week: “First, don’t collapse the future into the present moment. The future comes at us one day at a time.”

Second, maintain ’emotional distance’ from bad news. Recognize that you can’t control most of what Trump says or does. Given that fact, recognize that unchanneled anxiety and fear will not change the outcome. Focus on what you can do to change, impede, obstruct, or reverse policies we oppose.”

As I distance myself from the absurd news of January 20, I note that others have recommended that we all delete our Twitter (X) accounts that day, in resistance to the “Mump Regime” (Timothy Snyder’s term for Musk/Trump). That one is easy for me since I never had a Twitter account. Now I’m considering what to do about Facebook and Amazon.

I have already signed up for Bluesky as @prarywren55. Consider checking out that venue for social media. If you are on Bluesky, consider following me. I’m stumbling along. At my age, this whole social media thing is rather mysterious and incomprehensible. But in resistance against billionaire acquiescence to the returning chaos that Donald Trump brings, I plan to limit my Facebook appearances and try to figure out how to effectively use Bluesky. If you have tips for this old lady, I’d be glad to know them.

At one point in the last few months, when we eagerly anticipated the election of Kamala Harris, I endorsed a notion brought out by someone that on January 20, 2025, this year’s observance of Martin Luther King, Jr’s Day, our country’s first Black woman president would take her oath of office on Abraham Lincoln’s Bible, administered by our country’s first Black woman Supreme Court Justice.

Well, that isn’t happening. In another universe, it would have been grand.

So, it’s time to mourn that lost dream. In no way will I tune into the installation of a facist president. Instead, what can I do?

I might look up and read one–or several–of MLK’s sermons or speeches. https://crossculturalsolidarity.com/mlk-speeches-sermons-essays/

I might read a section from the biography of John Lewis: Walking With the Wind: A Memoir of the Movement 

I might review Amanda Gorman’s amazing poem from Joe Biden’s inauguration: “The Hill We Climb.” Or another of her awesome wordsmithing such as anything from her book Call Us What We Carry.  Or the recent poem “New Day’s Lyric,” which ends with the sentiment:

“Know what we’ve fought
Need not be forgot nor for none.
It defines us, binds us as one,
Come over, join this day just begun.
For wherever we come together,
We will forever overcome.”

–Amanda Gorman

For the few days following January 20, 2025, I will resist tuning into all the bad news. I will strive to support the recovery efforts of the horrific fires in California. I will honor my neighbors, of all hues and backgrounds. I will look for and celebrate the beauty of our natural world, and try to share some of it to help lift your spirits. Moment by moment. Day by day. We’ll get through this together.

Craig, Carter, and Compassion

Seventy-three years ago today, at 10:10 in the morning, a baby boy arrived in this world who would become a significant part of my life. Two decades later, I met Craig Winter in college at FHSU. We enjoyed traipsing around public parks and nature reserves in Kansas with our cameras, taking pictures of the wonders of nature. This morning I celebrated his life with a walk in the winter wonderland, taking a few pictures of the snow that fell overnight.

Craig and I were married in 1977, during Jimmy Carter’s presidency. Having taken a class in the biology department at FHSU together–a class called “Can Man Survive?” that examined all the environmental issues of the day, including the greenhouse effect and global warming as climate change was called then–we were united in our commitment to support the natural world and reduce humanity’s harmful effects that were due to our unmitigated greed. Jimmy Carter was our guy. They say he was ahead of his time. I don’t think so. The probability of a global consequence to our short-sighted ravaging of our planet was known more than 100 years ago. Society knew all the benefits of alternative energy in the 60s and 70s. But harnessing free energy from the sun didn’t make any corporations much money. Craig and I were supporters of Carter’s conservation methods–turn down the winter thermostat, 55 mph speed limit, his installation of solar panels on the White House. And we dreamed of becoming reliant on our own private energy production, even then.

Carter acted with the well-being of his neighbors in mind, a true Christian quality. He wasn’t ahead of his time. The “resistance” at that time was just way behind. Look where that got us as they gained and assumed power.

Craig became a cancer statistic 9 days after his 33rd birthday in 1985, and I became a widow. (Quite the stigma for someone not yet 30 years old.) But I haven’t forgotten our joint priorities, nor our admiration for President Jimmy Carter.

Photo courtesy of The Carter Center.             Cuba 2002–The Carter Center’s delegation to Cuba, being the first time since the 1959 Revolution that a sitting or former president visited Cuba.

After his time in office ended, President Carter showed that you don’t have to be the elected leader of the country to make a huge difference, and today, a day after President Jimmy Carter’s funeral in Washington, DC, I renew my commitment to make a difference for those in my circle, for the inhabitants of Earth’s future, and for all the non-human neighbors that are as dependent on this planet as we are dependent on their well-being. Those of us with the future of our planet and its life forms in mind are now the “resistance.”

This morning, in honor of Craig Winter, I was trekking around our acreage in the fresh snow with my camera, capturing scenes, just like we used to do. Thinking of you Craigie, as I always do on this day. With love.

NOTE: I am deeply grateful and indebted to my second husband, Mike, for his generous and compassionate heart for the last 36 years. He has never objected to my memories or to my honoring people from my personal history that helped make me what I am today. We are all products of our histories and our memories, not just the stimuli we receive at the present time. Thank you for being dad to all our children, and grandpa to all our grandchildren as well as allowing my heart to grieve through the years.

The Bell

“Joy to the World, the Lord is Come! Let earth receive her King,” I sang with my friends from Campfire Girls. Bundled in warm coats and woolen hats, we hardly noticed the night’s chill as we sang to our neighbors one December evening, long ago. My piano teacher smiled at us from her doorway. A toddler laughed in her arms, clinging to her with one hand and pointing to us with the other.

“Merry Christmas!” we said when we had finished. “Merry Christmas!”

We turned to the street and tromped to the next house. “Race you,” Sara said. She lunged into an awkward jog on the snow-covered street. She darted ahead of me, gaining momentum.

“Slow down, Sara,” said her mother, the adult who accompanied us.

Sara stopped running and slid in her boots along the packed tire tracks. I slid too. Other girls joined in and we ran and slid to the next house. Sara’s mother led us to the porch and rang the doorbell. A retired couple opened the door and we sang, “O Come, All Ye Faithful. . .” Our words wafted into the crisp air on puffs of vapor.

Our youthful energy carried us from door to door. Snowflakes fluttered through the black sky and smattered my cheeks with sprinkles. We passed under a street light and paused to watch the new snow float down. The flakes glinted in the light beam as they settled onto knee-high drifts on the ground. Tiny crystals of fallen snow sparkled like tiny polished gemstones.

We cut a trail across unbroken snow in a neighborhood park and skirted tennis courts which had been transformed into a winter ice-skating rink. Pine trees flanked our exit from the park, each cluster of needles decorated with tufts of snow.

As I passed the pines, Sara ran up behind me and bounced a limb. Snow sprayed in every direction, showering my face with needles of ice. I brushed the snow from my coat and chased her onto the residential street. We proceeded from house to house, sending joyous strains of familiar Christmas carols into the night air and wishing all a Merry Christmas.

Ontario Street marked the edge of town and we paused when we arrived. On the other side stood an apple orchard, still tended by an aging farmer. I expected that we would turn around and head back but Sara’s mother nodded across the street to the little farm house nestled in drifts of unbroken snow. “Let’s go there.”

“Nobody’s home, Mom,” Sara said.

“I bet he’s there,” her mother said. “Come on, girls, one more stop before we head home.”

I shivered, suddenly cold. The only time I’d seen the elderly farmer had been months ago when I had ridden my bicycle into his blooming orchard. He gruffly told me this was no place to play. “Go home,” he said, his face unsmiling and stern.

I dragged along with the last of the girls as we trudged across Ontario Street. None of us laughed now. We didn’t run and slide up his path. We plodded up the driveway, a smooth field of unbroken whiteness glowing in the night between rows of trees, the bare branches skeletal against mounds of snow.

We reached the back porch of the old farm house and crowded onto the landing. One of the girls broke an icicle from the porch roof and handed it to Sara.

“I don’t think anybody’s here,” Sara said again.

“Knock anyway. I see a light in there,” her mother said.

Sara knocked, timidly at first. She knocked louder the second time. The porch light came on. “How about ‘What Child is This?’ Ready?” Sara’s mother whispered.

The door swung open and the old farmer stared at us, a strange look on his face.

We sang, “What child is this who, laid to rest, on Mary’s lap is sleeping?”

Tears filled his eyes as we sang. At the last chord, he tried to speak, but the words caught in his throat. Sara’s mother took his elbow and guided him to a chair at the kitchen table.

“Have them come in,” he managed to whisper.

Sara’s mom motioned us into the kitchen. Someone started “Dashing through the snow,” and the rest joined in. We sang other songs, filling his house with music.

“Want some hot chocolate?” He leaned forward to stand.

“Let me,” Sara’s mom said. She bustled about the kitchen, stirring chocolate syrup into warming milk on the stove. It was the best hot chocolate I’d ever had.

We sang more songs. We sang all the Christmas songs we knew. I helped Sara wash the cups and return them to their cupboard.

“I’ve got to get these girls home,” her mother said.

We filed out the door and sang one more time, a hearty rendition of “We Wish You a Merry Christmas.”

“Merry Christmas!” we called as we turned away. “Merry Christmas!” Our boots crunched through the crystalline snow on our way toward Ontario Street. We had not quite reached the end of the driveway when a bell rang behind us. We turned to look back toward the farm house and the barn behind it. The tones deep and clear from an old school bell, rose from a belfry on top of the barn and floated through the air above us.

I tipped my head backwards, as if I could see the tones mingling with the snowflakes in the dark sky. The bell rang on, filling my heart with wonder. None of us spoke when the ringing stopped. The chimes died away in the pristine night air and stillness blanketed us with the enchantment of a winter evening.

Sara’s mother spoke with reverence and awe. “I haven’t heard that bell ring in twenty years.”

Twenty years.

Ever since that crystalline December night when I witnessed the magic of music, the custom of caroling has been a favorite holiday tradition. Music bridges generations, unites families, heals broken hearts, and brings good will to all. Seasons come and seasons go and I am now an old woman, pondering all the Christmases of my past. The love, the feasting, the hugs from distant family members coming together, the festive decorations, and anticipated years to come, but of all those years, none has quite matched the experience of hearing that old church bell peal across a snow-covered neighborhood, a message of hope, joy, and gratitude from one generation to the next.

May Heaven and Nature ring for generations to come.

On the Verge

Remember what it was like. After a long wait, it finally happened. With guarded optimism, you look forward to the big event. Though you know things can happen, chances are you won’t be in that slim margin. So you dance. You laugh. You hug everyone and share the good news. You imagine life after the event, the realization of a dream come true. The anticipation of anniversaries, holidays, and journeys to wondrous locations, savoring the unfettered excitement as your long-awaited dream discovers the world. Never a dull moment. Of course there will be challenges, but nothing you can’t work through and be stronger for it. You look forward to years of living, loving, and learning together.

Until there are none.

It all comes crashing down. Something was wrong at a routine checkpoint. No  heart beat. Emergency trip to the hospital. Before you have time to process the news, joy morphs into heartbreak. A birth becomes a funeral. It’s over. Dreams die hard.

After November 5, it struck me how similar the election loss was to the loss of an infant. Though it’s been decades ago, I feel the same sad aimless wandering and hopelessness with the election results as with my two sweet babes who died before they had a chance to live. Gone are the anticipated celebrations and birth anniversaries. Gone are all the anticipated years of discovering the world together. Gone are the memories and the history I looked forward to making.

Every morning brings more bad news to my inbox and I move through life on the verge of tears, almost—yet not quite—ready to open the floodgates.

How will I manage the coming hard times? How will I step forward, keep moving, go through the motions, when my heart is sorely wounded? How can I show up for others when I can’t even manage to cheer myself up? Where did all the good in the world, all the anticipated conquests of our precarious future—where did they go?

One of the writers I follow suggested asking two questions every day.

  • What do I still know and believe as truth?
  • Is my heart still beating?

In other words, my values remain and I can embrace them until my dying breath. It reminds me of the weeks and months following the burials of my sweet babes. It’s been forty years. (Almost 43 for the first and 42 for the second.) How did I work through the devastation?

Perhaps some things I did then will help now too. I journaled regularly, poured my soul onto pages in my notebooks. With tiny locks of hair and photos that spoke to me, I made lockets and hung them near my heart. Little by little, I dared to venture forth. I told myself I would make choices and take actions—small at first—but I would do it for the lost children. I would live for those who didn’t have the chance, and I would face each day for the sake of my lost loved ones. I would do my best to make a good life. For them.

I don’t know what lies ahead, though I face it with a certain amount of dread. I can only work with what is here, today, and do my best to make a difference for my family and for as many others as I can.

Do all the good you can,
By all the means you can,
In all the ways you can,
In all the places you can,
At all the times you can,
To all the people you can,
As long as ever you can.
― John Wesley

To the Stars

I chased sunsets in my youth. Often, my mother would ride along as evening approached, and I drove to the west side of town. A favorite hilltop offered a spectacular unobstructed view of the evening sky. This was back in the day when color photography was off limits to many but I wanted to give it a try. My dad ran a black and white portrait studio in our basement when I was very young, and I’d help him nurse the images to life in the darkroom under our stairs. But color was a different story altogether. It was the next thing, a new generation of photo art, and I took what I had learned from him and launched into color printing in our basement laundry room—new town, new home.

In those days, I could purchase the developing chemicals at our local K-Mart, just up the street. I used a “Unicolor” system, with a plastic drum, that had channels for various sizes of prints, up to an 8 x 10. You were to expose the paper with your enlarger, using color filters for the proper mix of pigmentation, and then fit the paper into the drum, in the dark, and seal it with the press-on lid. From there, you could operate in daylight, pouring each designated chemical through the spout into and out of the drum at the prescribed times. At the end—wallah!—I removed my color prints.

Moonrise
Moonset

With our Kansas state motto, “Ad astra per aspera,” (to the stars through difficulties) it’s a logical pastime to watch the sky. Here in the western plains, often the sky provides the most intriguing scenery to be found. Some sunsets are stunning. And no two are alike. The interplay of light with moisture in the air, as well as dust at times, provide distractions from ordinary difficulties along with the continuously changing scenery. I don’t print color enlargements these days, but try to find images worthy of sharing in a digital format. New generation. Next thing.

I found myself sky-watching again after the election a month ago. The vistas overhead provided consistency through their constant metamorphosis and it was comforting. If not exactly ad astra per aspera, then at least ad caelum.

Just for today: I will help someone celebrate

It hasn’t escaped my notice that even during the consternation of the election aftermath, there are people in my life who have reached milestones. In the last week:

My husband and best friend celebrated his birthday.

One young piano technician achieved her registered status by successfully completing the required series of exams.

One immigrant friend was received into full American citizenship after successful completion of the requirements laid out in our constitution.

Our grandson earned his first letter in high school athletics.

And I celebrate with each of these people in achieving part of their hopes and dreams.